Jiu Jitsu Community Eagerly Awaits Next Wealthy Benefactor

Members of the jiu jitsu community, traditionally used to having their art supported by rich patrons, wonders who will come along next to prop up the sport.

Rich businessman lighting cigar with $100 dollar bill

“We literally couldn’t care less who funds the money as long as there is shitload of it, am I right guys?!”

Bobby Biltong, a white belt from New Haverbrook, is hoping for “either a Russian oligarch or some kind of Wall Street Tycoon. Whoever it is, I just want them to come in, pump in a fuckton of money and completely imbalance the economy of the sport, and then fuck off again when they get bored.”

Brazilian Black Belt world champion Renato Silva, on his way to the Glorious Red Eagle Invitational, being held on a luxury superyacht off the coast of California, declined to comment. He was spotted driving a brand new Bentley, wearing a Russian Cossack hat and clutching “Arabic for Beginners”.

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