Poll Reveals 8 out of 10 Students Unsure on Whether to do a Shaka in Photos

Marcus Allenson (centre) is confident in his Shaka

Sources confirmed to us today that as many of 80 percent of Brazilian jiu jitsu students remain unaware of what hand signal to do when posing for photographs.

“Sometimes I do a thumbs up,” said a local three stripe blue belt, “or just a fist. I always feel goofy if I do a shaka because I’ve never been to Brazil. Or Hawaii, which is where it was invented I think.”

One local purple belt expressed regret at not starting to do shakas earlier. “People are used to me doing the double thumbs up now for photos. I feel that if I change people will think I’m flaky. I just don’t want to let anyone down.”

Marcus Allenson, a brown belt training in Lower Frampton, has been doing shakas in photos since his first week on that mats. “I feel I have a one up on my team mates, socially speaking. While they curl their fingers awkwardly and look sheepish, I just throw up a shaka straight away. I have a girlfriend, too. The two are probably connected.”

Randolph Jones says he has been permanently traumatised by the day he “did the thumbs up with one hand and the shaka with the other.”

“I don’t know what came over me, I panicked and I felt confused. The second I did it, I knew I had fucked up.”

Jones says he was never the same since mixing up the two hand signals. “I feel weak and helpless. I lost my manliness,” he said, weeping softly into his ice cream. The moment was forever immortalised in photo form, and his teammates take great pleasure in sharing the photo on social media.

“We call him Randy Two Signs,” said an anonymous source.

1 Comment

  1. “I don’t know what came over me, I panicked and I felt confused. The second I did it, I knew I had fucked up.”
    Jones says he was never the same since mixing up the two hand signals. “I feel weak and helpless. I lost my manliness,” HOLY FUCK YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST

    Like

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